Monthly Archives: December 2010

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All he needs is a partner but not a wife!

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All he needs is a partner but not a wife!

At times I wonder why men say what they say, but well I should not mind about that… but listening to such or reading about it in the newspaper just leaves me *?@*+/^#.

“I Want a Partner, Not a Wife”, he wrote, “She should understand my wife is my business partner, and I don’t plan to divorce her”. Wow that is HONEST, and I will leave that at that.

Back to Uganda, they are so many guys that need women in their lives provided they are not their wives… Even though it’s for life, they won’t complain, but try to mention the word ‘marriage’, you will be sorry you opened your mouth.

And this is not about money, in USA may be but in Uganda, I don’t think so but a good number of men are scared of marriage! I just keep wondering ‘why’ and who is answerable for the disgust men have towards marriage?

By Beneth
14/12/2010

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Fallen into the attraction trap?

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Fallen into the attraction trap?

Before you scream on top of your voice can you just give me a minute? Good. Well I call it a trap because it does not seem like it’s going to work for the good and yet you are so into this thing like ‘nala’ tomorrow.

Let me make the picture clear, as they say give you details… as we like it. Imagine this guy, every time you see him you borrow a minute to catch your breath, he runs over to you, gives you a hug and yes, you love it. You feel close to him even when he is miles away and at times it feels like you think a like! Sounds sweet? “Yes it does, but that is all there is… ”

This guy hardly calls you or even sends you an SMS but you can’t stop thinking about him or date another guy because in your mind you’re dating this ‘Sweet Guy’ much as he has never said anything that should even make you imagine that.

It’s confusing. You feel consumed by fear to lose him as though he was even once yours in the first place. Your heart feels fragile as though anytime it’s about to break but somehow he manages to squash your fears, bring a smile on your face and the urge to be patient and wait for that moment when the says those sweet words.

That is a trap my dear, it has consumed many but I beg you to stop dating imaginary boyfriends no matter how ‘sweet’ they look or sound… they are not worth your time. Such guys like your company but they are not ready to date or to be committed to anyone… and yes in the long run you will break your fragile heart, no matter how long it takes.

Watch out for the traps, and if you’re in one please run out!

By Beneth
14/12/2010

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When a woman goes silent

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When a woman goes silent

I have listened to many men complaining that their spouses talk too much… I’m like, ‘Is that a problem?’ A woman goes silent when her man stops listening so those of you, who don’t like her to talk, don’t listen and she will stop talking… but I would not do that if I were you.

They are few reasons why one would tell you something, 1: in search for help, 2: to let you know, and 3: to express their feelings towards the situation. Every woman would like her man to share with her his joyful moments as well as the sad moments… but unfortunately men are not so receptive to such talks. And so the woman has to keep asking, asking and asking … well the beautiful thing ends up being nagging to both parties.

Her keeping quite doesn’t mean she is does not have what to say, but she does not want to see that other look on your face, or else she knows what you are going to say to her. But this whole thing kills your communication and soon your relationship will be long gone. Asking means she cares about you, and silent means, I don’t want care; fight it by yourself, so you choose which part of her you need.

By Beneth
10/12/2010

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5 Ways to be blissfully happy as a single woman

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5 Ways to be blissfully happy as a single woman

Being in a relationship doesn’t guarantee happiness or even love. Many women are lonely, frustrated and sad in their relationships or marriages; it’s better to be single than stuck in a bad relationship. And here are several ways to be happily single…

  1. Figure out the source of your feelings: do you feel depressed, sad or lonely because you’re single? Find out why you want to be in a relationship, is it because your sister or friend is married with kids? Or maybe u feel worthless n think a relationship will validate you as a woman. To be happily single u need to figure out why you want to be married.
  2. Refuse to dwell on e’ the lack of love in your life; what u focus on expands, instead of dwelling on what you don’t have and causing your lack to grow. Stay focused on what u brings to all your relationships. E.g, do you wish you were a more successful woman? Make a list of you wonderful qualities and personality traits. The more you love and appreciate yourself; the happier you’ll be n the more attractive you’ll be to others. Don’t think about what you lack, instead, concentrate on what you want in your life.
  3. Connect to your source of power and inspiration; no matter how wonderful a boyfriend or husband is, he can’t give you peace, self-acceptance or happiness. Yu need to stay connected with your own source of inspiration and fulfillment; you need to protect your sense of self acceptance when you’re in love.
  4. Stay emotionally, physically and professionally healthy; what books, people, events, websites or groups help you feel connected to yourself? If you want to be blissfully happy and single, especially if you hoping for a new romantic relationship, make sure you taking care of all aspects of your health.
  5. Don’t wait for a man before you pursue the life of your dreams; do you want to take a month-long vacation then start your own business? You don’t need to be in a relationship to pursue your dreams. In fact, being involved with a man can make it more difficult to achieve your goals; women in relationships have to consider their partners’ needs, lifestyle, plans and family.

Whatever you want to do with your life, do it now!

Got this from Phiona, And all I can do is share it….
I would love to be a ‘blissfully happy woman’, hope I can count you in!

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What if we stopped complaining and gave a hand?

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For the last two weeks I have been wondering; how would this planet be if stopped complaining and did something about the things we believe are ‘not fair’ as we call them?

Like if each one of us opened a door to the homeless or to someone else’s dreams, or provided a meal to the hungry paint that picture with me and see a changed and great planet.

But NO, we don’t do that and some other people use these same people we have failed to help to make their own dreams come true… I don’t mean to sound bitter but I always look at the street kids and I feel terrible inside of me. We have given up on helping them because we believe it’s a ‘business’. Am not saying we should invest in some ones business but can’t we do something about the street kid that is being abused?

Another area that really gets to me is how we complain about our leaders; this area has two personalities; those that believe they can do better and don’t contest, and those that sit on their opinions and complain about the results.

I just keep wondering if some of you believe you can do a better job, why don’t you come up and urge us to support you, and those that don’t vote and then you question the results… honestly I have no words for you, may be you tell me whom you expect to vote for you?

We all know what we do and how we complain at the end of the day, my only prayer is that we just stop complaining and do something on those areas we feel uncomfortable with. Let’s give a hand, take a stand to the things we believe in, make our voices heard and take lead where need be for this will make this planet a place we want it to be.

By Beneth

07/12/2010