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Evaluate the man you date and understand the man you married

Evaluate the man you date and understand the man you married

Evaluate the man you date and understand the man you married

Evaluate the man you date and understand the man you married.

Many of us are found of evaluating the man we married, rather than the man we are dating! And that is so wrong! Well that is my opinion. I believe once you’re dating, that is the time to evaluating if this cute guy actually respects you.

Unfortunately when we’re dating we tend to focus on the gifts they shower us with, the ticking clock, our friends are all married, he is cute, and he is ready to settle down… why the wait? We lament to our selves! We pay no attention to what we’re settling with” So one month after the alter we start evaluating our husbands.

If he doesn’t respect you when you’re dating he won’t change over after the wedding. If that is what you said ‘I-do’ to, for whatever reasons you had, why are you stressed? I don’t mean that you take in all the trash he sends to you… all I’m saying is, evaluate the man you date, and understand the man you married.

You may not see all his bad characters, he can actually hide them away from you… but a bad guy won’t turn into a good guy overnight.

“What if am married to him already?” Am not married so I can’t claim to know it all, but am told ‘prayer works!’ Pray for him, ask God to work through him and do your part as a wife; understand him, support him, encourage him, and don’t try to criticize every little thing he does or raising your voice at him. However you can try to show him the danger in what he is doing.

What more can I say?
Happy Marriage!

Beneth 28/02/2011.

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God wants us to know

Free we should be

Free we should be

God wants us to know

I cry in the middle of the night
Do you?
Something touches my soul
Do you feel it?
Am not alone,
You’re not alone.
And God wants us to know.

God is there,
He is, for us
Just for us,
We’re not alone.
And God wants us to know.

You’re are hurt,
Am hurt too,
But we have to forgive,
Not that they deserve it,
But we do!
And God wants us to know.

God wants us to know
We don’t deserve to hold a grudge!
For we’re his temple,
God chose us to be free
Free we should be

Forgive them,
It’s hard
God knows too.
Let’s open our hearts for Him
And see things in as He sees them

He wants you to be happy
He wants me to be happy
His love is perfect
His name is healer
I and you are ‘his-own’
And God wants us to know.

God wants us to know
Forgive and be forgiven
Be happy and free
Then your spirit will worship Him.

Beneth
25/02/2011

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Just as you are about to say good bye to love

We long to fall in love, hold on to it as we enjoy every moment as it unfolds in our lives. We long to be loved and love as it’s a desire the creator put in our hearts.

However they are moments when we close the door to love, with a sharp pain in our hearts that it brought us in its last visit. And just as you say Good bye, Love knocks again on your door.

You may sit on the floor with you back on leaning on the door and cry, due to the fear you have in your heart. You may wonder, should I open the door, should I let my heart to this love again, what about its pain?

Truth be told, no one can say, they wont hurt you and you can’t promise the same either, something may go wrong, something will make you cry at some point… but amidst love… there is something that will make you smile, laugh and make you feel lighter.

That is what you will cherish, but you will never know unless you open the door to love.

By Beneth,

11/Jan/2011

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5 Ways to be blissfully happy as a single woman

5 Ways to be blissfully happy as a single woman

Being in a relationship doesn’t guarantee happiness or even love. Many women are lonely, frustrated and sad in their relationships or marriages; it’s better to be single than stuck in a bad relationship. And here are several ways to be happily single…

  1. Figure out the source of your feelings: do you feel depressed, sad or lonely because you’re single? Find out why you want to be in a relationship, is it because your sister or friend is married with kids? Or maybe u feel worthless n think a relationship will validate you as a woman. To be happily single u need to figure out why you want to be married.
  2. Refuse to dwell on e’ the lack of love in your life; what u focus on expands, instead of dwelling on what you don’t have and causing your lack to grow. Stay focused on what u brings to all your relationships. E.g, do you wish you were a more successful woman? Make a list of you wonderful qualities and personality traits. The more you love and appreciate yourself; the happier you’ll be n the more attractive you’ll be to others. Don’t think about what you lack, instead, concentrate on what you want in your life.
  3. Connect to your source of power and inspiration; no matter how wonderful a boyfriend or husband is, he can’t give you peace, self-acceptance or happiness. Yu need to stay connected with your own source of inspiration and fulfillment; you need to protect your sense of self acceptance when you’re in love.
  4. Stay emotionally, physically and professionally healthy; what books, people, events, websites or groups help you feel connected to yourself? If you want to be blissfully happy and single, especially if you hoping for a new romantic relationship, make sure you taking care of all aspects of your health.
  5. Don’t wait for a man before you pursue the life of your dreams; do you want to take a month-long vacation then start your own business? You don’t need to be in a relationship to pursue your dreams. In fact, being involved with a man can make it more difficult to achieve your goals; women in relationships have to consider their partners’ needs, lifestyle, plans and family.

Whatever you want to do with your life, do it now!

Got this from Phiona, And all I can do is share it….
I would love to be a ‘blissfully happy woman’, hope I can count you in!

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Why does a friend become an enemy?

Why does a friend become an enemy?

I don’t know about you, but if you are to tell me the truth, 90% of the people you call your enemies were once your friends.

Have you ever wondered how all starts, I would say it starts with us. We trust too much, we idolize them in our lives, what they say or do, we do, we forget we had a life before met these friends in our lives, we feel we own them and since we are friends they should be loyal to us.

That is too much to ask or hope for, and that is our problem.

Let me ask,

If you have a friend who always tells you problems, and every day you have to cry with them… won’t you feel they are weighing you down?

May be not, what if?

If you have a friend who always has something to celebrate, won’t you feel jealous?

May be not, what if?

Have you ever felt you need to compete with your friend, why did you feel that? What drove you to do it?

Anyway the bottom line, our friends are human, and I believe we prefer them as friends than enemies so before they cross over, let’s treat them as humans.

Don’t make them your idols, don’t drive them to the jealous zone, don’t use them as problems-bin, respect them and the things that are dear in their lives; and above all, don’t forget to live your life.

By Beneth

13/10/2010

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Friends don’t know it all.

Friends don’t know it all.

Have you ever sat down and your friend has a lot to share, going on with this and that… and you start wondering if you are distracted because you seem to understand what the problem is.

 

We all have friends to lean on, and those that lean on us.  And I would say it’s normal to fail to understand the problem you’re friend is going through, Actually I would say,  it’s ok to say “Buddy I have no idea of what you are talking about..” than claim to understand and give wrong or insensitive advice. Being someone’s friend does not give you super power to solve every problem.

 

I don’t mean to be rude, but honestly some of those issues we tell our friends are just beyond them. Well we may need someone to cheer us up but let us not go to the last detail explaining the dots and commas in our lives.

By Beneth

13/10/2010

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What better words do we hope to hear that God has not said?

What better words do we hope to hear that God has not said?

I don’t know if we like lamenting; “I don’t that this, I don’t have that… ”, God must be wondering what exactly wrong with us.

 

We tend to limit what God can and can’t do, we give Him boundaries in which to operate, and in the end we lose it all.

 

If some tells you “am not man to lie”, “Nothing is impossible for me…”, “ask and you will receive…”, “Don’t let your heart be troubled… I will get that done” What better words do we hope to hear that he has not said?

 

Honestly, why do we still we get ourselves worked up. Why don’t we take heart, ask Him, be still, and wait for Him to work it out His way?

Read: Ephesians 3:20.

By Beneth

13/10/2010

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Am free

Am free

Am free from pain,
From the hurting
For I have tested forgiveness.

Our God is stronger
He is full of mercy and Grace,
And he heals
All that he touches.

He has transformed me,
With the gentleness in his hands.
Now am free,
I have tested his love.

He can heal you,
Take away your pain,
If only you let him.

Am free,
You can be free.

By Beneth
31/09/2010